The Story Behind the Story
After working in human resources for years, it has become very apparent to me that there is always a story behind the story. In other words, nothing is as it seems and there is always room to dig a little deeper to get to the heart of what matters.
For example, I was recently having a discussion with a client and it became clear to me that there was an underlying cause to an employee’s uncharacteristic behaviour. The employee’s performance had been sliding and their behaviour was questionable, causing them to appear as though they were “acting out.”
When I sat with my client and dissected what could be the potential cause of the behaviour, the conversation stayed fairly surface level. Of course, we were working on thoughts and assumptions, and the real answer could only be found in one way: creating the space for a conversation.
When you begin to notice that someone’s behaviour is changing or they seem a bit “off”, ask questions. Pay attention to how people are doing and take a few moments to reach out to them.
“Be brave and start tough conversations with your employees.”
Things often won’t go away on their own and many of us take a “wait and see approach.” We wait to see if the issue will resolve itself, but unfortunately, that rarely works.
When things have been going on for too long, it becomes more and more difficult for us to approach the problem and address the issue. Time creates awkwardness, and the issue often becomes magnified, which creates a much larger problem.
People speak to us all the time. Most of the time, that is accomplished with words, while other times it is through non-verbal communication. Sometimes, people speak with their behaviour and when that happens, it is our job to listen and check in with them. We should be digging a little deeper and setting aside our own assumptions.
The truth is, we never know what is going on with another person unless we ask them. It could be a number of things – sick children, aging parents, a troubled marriage – or perhaps they are unhappy with something at their job and they don’t know how to express it. Whatever it is that they are dealing with, we won’t really know what is at the heart of the issue unless we create a dialogue.
Your Engaged Assignment: Check your team’s performance. Is there anyone on your team that you need to dig a little deeper with to get the story behind the story? If so, make that your mission this week. Be brave — you’ve got this!
We want to hear from you! Have you ever had an experience where you let something fester longer than necessary? If so, what happened? Tell us about that moment and how you overcame it in the comments below!
